Breastfeeding (postnatal thoughts)

Following on from my Breastfeeding (antenatal thoughts), what, how, and why did I do following my baby being born?

I breastfed. Yep, that's right. I could and I did. So far, successfully. 

In the hospital I was told to wake her and feed her every hour. She would only feed for five minutes, then sleep again. The staff were concerned she wasn't feeding long enough or not latched on correctly, they checked, she was. When I was discharged (20 hours after her birth), there was a gap on approx. 3 hours between feeds, which she slept through. After waking her, she fed about 20 minutes before falling back asleep.

I continued to wake her every hour, but was exhausted myself, often falling asleep whilst feeding her. Not good! We incrased the gaps between feeds, although still had to wake her! 

As we've gone on she will let me know when she's ready. She is skilled at emptying a breast quickly! It can be painfully full, but within 5 minutes of starting a feeding, it's dry and baby is contently full and asleep. 

I have fed her wherever we are when she needs feeding and have never received any negative comments. There are a lot of places that have feeding rooms now, although I have never used one. 

During our trip to London for the Olympics, I fed her in the Olympic Staduim. I felt quite self conscious at first, but your dignity soon goes after the first leak! When she was about 6 weeks, we were feeding in a cafe, she let go, and the milk kept coming, straight over the table! I was so embarassed, I wanted to hide, but I couldn't, so on we went, with mumbled apologies.

As I was still having therapy, I restarted my appointments four weeks after her birth. At that point I couldn't express, she just wasn't leaving enough behind. To be honest, she's now 13 weeks and I still cannot express a lot unless she misses a feed so it defeats the object. 

Anyway, so no boob and no expressed milk. I did the unthinkable, I left a bottle of formula for her! Oh no! Terrible mummy. She wont take a bottle. She'll get nipple confusion. She wont go back to breast...

Utter crap! She took the formula and the bottle no problem, and went back to breast with no issues. She now has formula one or two feeds a week and she is fine switching between both.

Review of Mam style dummies

OK I know dummies are bad, they affect breast feeding... blah blah blah...

Oh wait, they are now good, they can help prevent cot death.

Anyway, for whatever reason I chose to give my baby a dummy / soother / pacifier. I tried a few different ones, and she would only take one type, the MAM style ones. She preferred them, and now she is getting older she is able to handle these better too. They don't have the fiddly handle bits, but a chunky button style holder. MAM have soothers from 0+ with various colours and designs. They have either a silk teat or a natural latex teat, and are BPA free. MAM soothers also come in their own box to store and sterilise them. You can even order personalised ones online.

Ever had to feel around in your baby's moses basket / crib / cot to find your baby's dummy in the night? Well MAM have the solution to that, MAM Night, they glow in the dark! Great!

Although I bought the initial dummies on the high street, I have since used their website and was impressed with the service and delivery timescales.

MAM's UK website

MAM's Online Store

Breastfeeding (antenatal thoughts)

Just in case you don't know by now, Breast is Best.

So what happens when you can't breastfeed, or actually just don't want to? You become the scum of the Earth.

Throughout my pregnancy I was constantly told about how breast feeding is best for both, mum and baby. At every appointment I went to I received more leaflets on it. Now whilst I was pregnant and not in the best of (mental) health I was really struggling with everything. One of my major issues (and I'm fairly certain I'm not alone in this) is that EVERYTHING I can or don't do is a reflection of sh*t I am, an excuse to beat myself up and generally set the negative emotions and thoughts flowing, until I feel so crap that life isn't worth living.

My pregnancy (physically) was straight forward, despite the ongoing drama that can be the NHS. OK, so it wasn't the Disney 'life is wonderful, all glowing' experience, but no major issues either. I hoped that I would be able to breastfeed, I did not think otherwise. But then, what if I can't? I mean some women produce no milk, can't get baby to latch on, don't like it, and a million and one other reasons why they might not or cannot breast feed. This made me quite panicky, given my mental health and my uncertainty about being a mother, things obviously escalated quite quickly. It's the only thing I can do (personally) as a mother, so what if I can't? Obviously I'm right if thinking she'd be better elsewhere....

In the final months of my pregnancy I was admitted to The Mount. I had spoken about my fears with the staff there, who gave me lots of positive words. The phrase that stuck with me was 'There's a reason we have a milk kitchen'. And it helped, to an extent, but I decided I didn't want to think or talk about it. 

My Health Visitor came to meet me and her first question (not the only person to do so, I hasten to add) was, 'Are you going to breastfeed?'. I burst in to tears!